Random things I learned at my new job

1.0 Toward is American English, Towards is British English.
2.0 The grant review processes for research dollars is not exactly what one would call "objective."
3.0 There is more jargon is the world than my mind can possibly process.
3.1 Social determinants of health
3.2 Endpoint
3.3 MUA/P
3.4 Overweight as noun, as in "to decrease overweight and obesity."
3.5 Endless alphabet soup: NIH; CLABSI; Rx, Dx, Tx; M&M; BRCA1; MMTV-neu mouse; etc...
4.0 U.S.News & World Report always, always, always looks like a typo.
5.0 Doctors don't hold elevators - even in the parking garage - after work.
5.1 Nurses always look angry. Now I understand why.
6.0 The Shoreway is the best commuter route in Northeast Ohio.
6.1 We have the best sunrises and sunsets in October.
6.2 There are always kite fliers at Edgewater - even at 7 am.
6.3 I still haven't seen the surfers, but I'm optimistic.
7.0 Dansko clogs are not considered work-appropriate attire.
7.2 But cowboy boots go unmentioned.
8.0 The money really does go to patient care.
8.1 Because we're still working with an early 90s donor database that reminds me of the Flying Toaster screensaver.
9.0 Despite warnings that it would, my printer does not actually jam when I re-use paper.
9.1 It's called recycling.
9.2 Deal with it.
10.0 If things that cured cancer in mice could cure cancer in humans, we'd have that checked off the To Do list by now.