why should kate spade have all the fun

Over the years I've collected a good deal of raw materials for sewing.
A textile-lover at heart, I've always been a sucker for antique ribbons and the odd 30s button.

Thanks in large part to the democratization of style, hipster hand-made and the rise of Anthropologie, Miu Miu and Kate Spade, it's perfectly normal to dress like you raided your eccentric aunt's clothespress and decked yourself out like Little Edie.

You've seen the feather shoes.
Now come the flats.

I purchased a pair of silver flats from Target a couple of weeks ago and they left me - pardon the pun - flat.
I dug around my suitcase of scraps and came up with silk ribbon and art deco buttons...

Before and after



Lounging in my bedroom



I think I need feather flats...

voyeurism

New York Magazine started a weekly column called the sex diaries.

The link leads to the first article from April and if you search for "sex diary" in the New York Mag website, you'll get a list of previous weekly columns.

I love knowing what others are doing... helps me feel that my own actions are in a respectable place along the continuum.

mish mash

a few things:
I changed out my iPod mini battery last night - v. proud because it required sharp tools and the removal of and dilly dallying with the motherboard.
I know less than nothing about electronics (it took me a good 10 minutes to figure out how to power up my first laptop... and other 5 years to learn that you say "power up" as opposed to "turn on")

Even though there is still one sad little responsibility for my last job, I am pretty much officially done with my previous job, I have a solid understanding of my current gig and I have no more outstanding obligations like, say, a wedding or something.

Today I actually left work at 5, went to the gym and got to listen to my iPod for longer than 2 songs (because somehow I managed to not completely fuck up the motherboard).

I cooked an awesome dinner with whole fresh raw food materials, with the exception of frozen fish.
I used herbs and lettuces and tomatoes from my garden (full disclosure, the only tomatoes that have successfully grown self-seeded from last years crop, and I only just noticed them last week... lame? Totally).

I've got healthy lunches planned and packed and I'm doing laundry at a reasonable rate instead of the once a month wash-a-thon of desparation.

and dishes done.

all i need is to change my sheets, take a lush bath (I'm thinking Avobath or maybe Youki-Hi...) and crack my book.

'night all!

success!

the wedding was smashing success
(I went with dottie 50s housewife shoes - btw)
the minister got a little heavy-handed in the homily about two being better than one.

by the time it was over, I was convinced that I was going to die in a freezing cold bed.
alone.
with no one to find my body.
or mourn my death.
and that singlehood is an indicator of being forsaken by a higher power.
and should be avoided at all costs.

and then I found out later that the minister recently experienced a divorce.

yeah...

it was a little intense.

but otherwise, the friends, company, food and wine were great.
everything necessary for a great party.

I have a problem

UPDATE: Behold! The feather shoe.
Created to distract me from writing a now long-forgotten final paper from some class that was vaguely important and that I am still paying for with student loans and will be for years to come.





Whadya think, appropriate for the rehearsal dinner?

These hold more than a little meaning for me, as days after completing them, my apartment caught fire.
And now it (and I) have dusted off the ashes and moved forward to better things.

Phoenix feather shoes? hmm... pretty hokey.
but I dig the concept.
and the shoes.

back to original post.

...speaking of consumerist mindsets...

I'm going away for 4 days.
f. o. u. r.

I have packed 6 pairs of shoes.
s. i. x.

3 JUST for the wedding.
Elle McPherson 2004-Met-Chanel-Gala-Rhinestone flat sandals?
Carrie Bradshaw Sex-and-the-City-you'll-put-an-eye-out-if-you're-not-careful lavendar-hued silver stilettos?
Amy Sedaris Dotty-Fifties-Housewife-reimagined-through-modern-ironic-sensibilities moss-green velvet heels with purple and black costume jewels and hot pink silk mini-bow mules?

crap.

i need to need less options.

p.s. ditching the stilettos, going with sandals... or dotty mules.

opera for the people

I mentioned my love of radio david byrne in an earlier post

anyway, this month's playlist is opera! wunderbar oper!

from his description about arias...
"They were the popular music of the day and the audiences were rowdy and noisy — you could eat, drink and probably fornicate in the theaters at that time. Farmers and fishermen sang these tunes in fields and bars — and so can we."

so tune in, turn on and enjoy stories about such things as affairs, murder, betrayal, passion, and sex.
lots and lots of sex.

and sometimes redemption...

but mostly sex.

check it out - streaming on itunes (under eclectic)
or at his website

did i mention the sex?

Smug domesticity

Slate had a great article about the inevitable shift of "chick lit" into "mommy lit."

I've been thinking for some time about some of the themes this critic touches on, mostly that of the smug domesticity.

Don't get me wrong, I have my Martha moments, and I love looking at the Restoration Hardward catalog and imaging a nice clean sage and silver life - but what get under my skin is the domesticity that invariably comes with marriage and the smug attitude that this is exactly what one's whole life has been leading up to.

...and the problems that come when slightly-harried-and-lovin'-it turns into oh-my-god-I-had-no-idea-this-is-what-it-would-be-like.

Because somehow it seems with all the lifestyle brands - Crate & Barrel, Pottery Barn, J Crew - we've taken the already romanticized notion of married life and turned it into a completely unattainable goal that leads many to disappointment and some into divorce.

I've been wondering if my generation may be completely unprepared for the realities of long-term, committed relationships.

It seem we're all about the narcissistic love, the its-about-me-being-me love; in other words, the conditional love. Which is fine, if you admit it's conditional. But we don't. We buy rings and take vows and stuff conditional into a box labeled "unconditional" and act suprised and defeated when it doesn't work out.

I think we need to find someway to let marriage be marriage, but in the context of the current consumer environment.

And yes, I said consumer.

Because choosing a mate is on some level like shopping.
What better indicator of who you are than who you choose to represent your other half.
And that's what lifestyle brands and consumer choices seem to be all about... identifying yourself as a member of some larger tribe.
Are you le creuset or cuisanart?
j crew or anthropologie?
starbucks or deweys?
hummer or prius?
east side or west side?
urban or suburban?

So you choose and get chosen, and things feel good and life sort of reflects the fantasy. But what about when the person you choose changes? Depression sets in? Or they find a commitment to a new diety? Or it's just not right? What then?

The tension between the conditional and the unconditional sets in.
(Buyer's remorse...?)
How long do you support them?
At what point is the change too much?
Is it selfish to leave or foolish to stay?

It's not like you can just... return them.
And you rarely have the power the change them (even if you can withhold sex - ladies, this DOES NOT WORK... sets a BAAAAAAD precedent and ruins things for those of us next in line...
seriously.)

And to add insult to injury, leaving seems to be this black hole of devastating personal failure since marriage and settling down have been pretty much accepted as the ultimate goal.

So obviously, it stands to reason that if you achieve it - and then lose it - you've somehow failed as a member of society.

I think we're setting ourselves up for failure.

Soul-sucking, depression-causing, people-breaking failure.

Are long-term relationships doomed as long as we have fickle consumer tendancies?

Would anyone get married if they knew its not all backyard barbeques and clutter-free living rooms?

I'm just curious to know since I'll be walking down an aisle as a bridesmaid for the SEVENTH TIME this weekend.
And a couple of friends have recently announced divorces/separations.

So there's a whole lotta stuff swirling around up there.